When I graduate, I’ll miss my student discount card

With my post-secondary tenure coming to an end, I find myself reflecting on the aspects of student life I will miss most. While I am certain four-month summer holidays, constantly meeting new and interesting people and between-class naps will always hold a special place in my heart, I am confident the facet of my post-secondary education I will yearn for most once I’ve graduated is student discounts.

As a society, we have a shared understanding that students can’t afford anything at full price. Perhaps due to our low-paying summer jobs, expensive drinking habits and crippling tuition costs, we students find ourselves in a perpetual state of near insolvency. The powers that be have decided all students are entitled to price markdowns as a form of deliverance from our unending state of pennilessness. And let me tell you, I use these entitlements to their full extent.

Thirty-five per cent off internet plans for students, check. Buy-one-get-one-free pizza Monday through Friday, you bet. Twenty-five per cent off my ski pass, absolutely. The entirety of my adult spending habits have been warped by the 3.5 by 2-inch student card provided to me at the beginning of every fall semester. With the authority to save me hundreds of dollars per year, this inconspicuous piece of plastic chaperoned my expenditures through the good, the bad and the downright ugly. I wielded this cost-saving power to great effect, and in doing so kept my belly full, my lights on and a barely leaky roof over my head.

But alas, like a blooming flower or a beloved family pet, all good things must come to an end. Staring at the precipice of graduation, I must come to terms with the fact that my student card can no longer guide me in my penny-pinching endeavours. Henceforth, like an adult, I will be required to pay full price for the things I wish to purchase. That is, of course, until I reach the age of sixty-five, when I can claim the seniors’ discount.

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